Morose Musings

It seems like it is another day ... another day where things don't go right and the world feels like it is closing in or crashing down.

And what starts it all? Something at work? A small comment someone makes that is taken out of context or something you say that is taken out of context and leads to you thinking ... is that what they really think of me? Something not going right? Machinery that doesn't work? Money troubles? 

Could it be all of the above or one that aggravates the others? 

Being honest about how crap you feel doesn't seem to help - in fact, you just seem to spread the depression like a dark cloud that leaves no trace of light.  Not being enthusiastic when you feel none, not being "raaraa" when you don't feel the "sisboomba". You try be happy, try cheer yourself up... and it doesn't work. So now what? You continue the sadness and get told that you are making the other person depressed or you tell the other person you don't feel like talking anymore and get accused of being rude... catch 22. 

Oh well... life goes on... whether crap or good.  

Ninja Dogs Dream

Well here is another installment of the weird and wackiness that is my REM cycle.

The latest odd dream revolves around ninja dogs and a Japanese warrior demon. It all begins with my friend, Christine Porter, and I taking a drive through countryside that looks vaguely like that found in the UK. All narrow cobbled streets and leaning buildings. We stopped my car (the one I drive in SA - a blue Ford Fiesta) outside what looked like an old farm yard with white picket fence, old barn and a deserted-looking farm house.  Strangely enough it was right on a main street in a small country town which also happened to be on the edge of a dam that looks remarkably like where my mother stays in Hartbeespoort.

We exited the car and made our way towards the old barn, the sound of hay and gravel crunching beneath our flip flop-clad feet.
"Hello? Is anyone there?" I hollered as we reached the open doorway to the dimly lit barn. No sound came from within - a rather foreboding silence. We walked around the building only and back to my car, seeing neither animal nor person.

As we approached the car, a pack of dogs appeared on the road before us, beyond the front of the car. They were medium-sized and pure black with white faces, all identical (almost like the picture but actual dogs - similar to to the Husky breed). Christine looked at me as I turned my head to look at her. Seemingly the same thought in our heads. RUN!

I ran to the passenger door, and Christine headed for the driver's side. I fumbled with my keys as I pulled them from my bag  and threw them to her. We jumped in almost simultaneously and Christine started the car. It roared to life and she slammed it into first gear just as the first dog jumped at my window.  The car skidded away to the sound of yelping dogs and I looked in the rear view mirror to see them running after us through the plume of dust my tires kicked up. My sigh of relief was short-lived as I looked back to the road, only to see a dog somehow climbing from the grill and onto the bonnet (no idea how that is physically possible). It growled and on a closer looked its fur was in fact a ninja suit. I leaned out the window, seeing a sharp corner coming, and grabbed it by the scruff of its neck.

"Throw it into the dam!" Christine shouted as she took the corner at a speed and the car drifted on the sandy street.

I let it go and it went flying through the air, landing hard and rolling the last few feet to the dam's edge. With a sploosh it sank beneath the water as we high trailed it out of there.

It swapped into another dream at this point.

Zombie Dream

Yet another weird dream. This time I felt the urge to share it with the world. Though very few people seem to actually see this. Anyway, I am getting off track. 

So zombie dreams. According to www.dreammoods.com, dreaming about being attacked by zombies means the following:
To dream that you are attacked by zombies indicate that you are feeling overwhelmed by forces beyond your control. You are under tremendous stress in your waking life. Alternatively, the dream represents your fears of being helpless and overpowered.


I am not totally convinced but you can tell me if you think it fits in with the dream. 


Starts out with me and a few other people, including my short and slight cuddly mother, walking into a large building with a predominantly steel and glass exterior with concrete pillars and floors on the inside. As with most zombie movies, the building was dark, creepy and falling into a state of ruin. 


On entry we were set upon by several armed people, some carried guns and knives, others random gardening equipment or bats. 


"Get out, you are not welcome here," a burly grey-haired army-looking man growled (He looked like the guy from Avatar and Terra Nova). 


"You don't own the building, I didn't see 'Property of Asshole' written on the front." I said, my hands tightening on the shotgun I held. (Last time I used a shotgun I had a bruise the size of a tennis ball on my shoulder... as you can see that is a funny thought... me brandishing a firearm.)


He begrudgingly nodded his head, "Fine, you can stay but keep clear of us."


As the man and his group began to turn away, the distant but unmistakable sound of zombie-esque growling came from the hallway behind us. 


"Hide, Mom!" I shouted as I turned towards the horde of the undead running lopsidedly towards us. 


She found a door that lead outside and hid (didn't make much sense to me even in the dream) behind a concrete slab with a window that one could easily see her through. Apparently zombies are stupid and can't tell if a person is alive or not if they freeze. 


Anyway, myself and the group we had just met fired, bashed and slammed into the first wave of zombies before they gave up and made a speedy retreat (or as speedy as a zombie can be). 


My mom returned to my side and the army guy gave me a nod of approval before leaving with his posse. We searched the building for a transport device, which turned out to be a teleporter. 


"We will get to the airport. It isn't too late. He will be there." I told her reassuringly. 


We waited the night for some reason (possibly waiting for someone to repair the teleport pad). 


In the morning, we hopped onto the teleport pad and WOOSH SPLAT! we arrived at the airport. The funny part was that the teleport pad on the other side had been damaged and stood at a decidedly bad angle, meaning that as we came through, we were flung across the tiled floor. The airport was light and strangely clean, apart from the mangled metal structure that held the teleport pad. The rows of airport chairs were filled with people, chatting and laughing. A man with an afro sat in the centre of the front row, strumming a tune that sounded vaguely familiar. He looked up as I skidded to a halt a few feet away and got to my feet. He was a light-skinned African-American (who looked like the blue-eyed doctor from Grey's Anatomy - you know the one). He smiled, got to his feet and shrugged a backpack over his shoulder, holding the guitar by the neck. 


And that is where it ended. Really odd dream but funny! 


Image from http://www.666gamer.com/images/

The New Year: The Year of the Dragon

Well, it is a new year and a relatively new job. Starting my own business was far more difficult than I anticipated and as a result that dream has been put on the back-burner until I have enough money to get a business off the ground.

I have recently entered into the employ of a company by the name of RedInk Multimedia. After four months of organising, sorting and administration, I have settled into the role of Administrator... not one I enjoy but for the moment I will 'suck it up' and get on with my work.

Being the year of the dragon, I hope this year is one of adventure, new experiences and success. Whilst at the New Year Cultural Festival at the Nanhua Buddhist Temple, I made a wish for just those things. It was really quite an experience. Apart from the hustle and bustle of hundreds of people (something I dislike intensely), it was a great experience. The food was fantastic despite the lack of meat, the entertainment was beyond my expectations and the company was new and totally enthusiastic.

With the offering light ceremony at the beginning, filled with chanting and the ceremonial lighting of candles and then placing them on the tables before the statues, the day started on a sombre note.

We went to get food and possibly the biggest milk tea drink I could have possibly imagined ... the straw was as think as my middle finger.  It is HUGE!!!! And I thought my giant tea cup was big.













We watched the Opening Ceremony which consisted of a dragon dance and 3 tigers doing jumps and tricks.  The dragon was carried by about 20-25 men doing jumps and running around the open area... the tail end being the ones that had to run the most - having to catch up with the rest of the body.













The tigers were in different colours: a purple (in the back of the picture to the left), a golden one (in both pictures) and a red one. The tigers have 2 men in them who jumped onto wobbly benches, unsteady stands and high tables - seemingly with ease!




 The day ended with some quick shopping - didn't buy anything though except a parasol for the sun when watching the opening ceremony, making a wish and throwing it onto the wish tree, visiting the museum to see ink art and driving our way home!



So this year should be an interesting one, apart from doing my honours in Psychology (a daunting task in itself), I have a relatively new relationship under way (a full 8 months) and the prospect of moving to a new place together and a new job.

Contemplating Madness

I have been contemplating the madness of my own psyche and have come to the conclusion that more people should dip their toes into the pool of insanity. Makes for interesting conversation, whether it be between your multiple personalities, you and the voices in your head or with a random stranger on the street.

In all instances insanity can be that proverbial icebreaker.

"Are you real or just a figment of my imagination?"

What a pickup line!

Mad people are very rarely boring, except for the catatonics (drooling and staring vacantly into the middle distance - FUN!), and in most cases they are quite intelligent. Steer clear of the sociopaths and psychopaths ... best not to mix with people that may want to wear your skin as a dress.

I suppose everyone is mad in their own way ... bit of OCD, bit of paranoia ... we all have a quirks and eccentricities.

I say EMBRACE THEM!

Anticlimax

After all that stress and imaginings of my imminent doom... nothing happened. She was (can you believe it) NICE! Gave me advice and encouragement and wished me all the best.

No sulphurous fumes ... no fiery torment.... no being poked with a pitch fork... all was cordial and serenity...

How very disappointing ... and here I thought I would be able to come back on here and spill forth my malice and feelings of injustice... oh well ...

Yay for a month and a bit of slavery!!

Then.... FREEEEDOM!!

Quitting your job

It is rather difficult deciding how one should drop the proverbial bomb on one's boss. Monday or Friday? Morning or Afternoon? Letter or Email? Meeting or chuck the letter at the boss and run? Decisions, decisions.... It would be so much easier if you could hire someone to do it for you, someone impartial who wouldn't mind receiving the brunt of the boss' wrath.

Any takers? No?

I have never had to give in my resignation ... so this is rather new to me. I do not relish the insanity that will ensue once I have broken the news, nor do I relish the idea of the full calendar month following said news breaking... From experience with applying for leave ... I can imagine it will not be pleasant.

Level 1 - Hell, Level 2 - Purgatory, Level 3 - Tartarus, Level 4 through 7 - Dante's Inferno

 Maybe I could take the stairs?